THE THRONE-ROOM SCENE OF THE LAY OF LEITHIAN
retold in the vernacular as a dramatic script
(with apologies to Messrs. Tolkien & Shakespeare)
Dramatis Personae & Cast, in order of appearance
[this is how I'd cast them - you're free to supply your own actors,
of course.]
The Human Bard Gower (appearing courtesy of
The Rose Playhouse)
Derek Jacobi (appearing
courtesy Henry V)
Luthien aka Tinuviel, Princess of Doriath
Claudia Black (appearing
courtesy Farscape)
Elu Thingol, King of Doriath
Jeremy Irons (appearing
courtesy Brideshead Revisited)
Melian the Maia, Queen of Doriath
Emma Thompson (appearing
courtesy Sense & Sensibility)
Beren Barahirion, Human Warrior
Christian Bale (appearing
courtesy Treasure Island, Little Women)
Mablung, Captain of Doriath
Ronald Colman (appearing
courtesy The Prisoner of Zenda)
Beleg Cuthalion, Elven Ranger
David Niven (appearing
courtesy The Prisoner of Zenda)
Daeron the Bard, Elven Flautist
Lani John Tupu
(appearing courtesy Farscape)
Citizenry of Doriath (nonspeaking parts)
as themselves (appearing
courtesy of Mandos)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Gower:
Now
envision wide upon this
meager screen,
the lofty arches of
deep Doriath,
where Elu Thingol, gray
King of Elves
and Melian the Wise
his wife
whose birth precedes
the eldest stars,
hold high court before
their host.
--Let thy mind
make of our panel white
and keystrokes black
Shining caverns, enlumened
all with bright
lamps of white gems
all fashioned fair
upheld by dragons carved
and gilt,
and water flowing o'er
the stone
like to a grotto fashioned
of the gods
where birds do sing
beneath no sun --
Here,
into the shade of the
holy trees
Luthien Tinuviel doth
lead her love,
Beren the wanderer from
out the woods,
before her mother musing
and infuriate sire
before the assemblage
of her friends and kin
and doubtful Daeron
that betray'd of love . . .
Luthien:
Mom, Dad -- this is
my fiance, Beren.
Thingol:
Well, well, well.
So you're the fellow who's been camping in my woods
this past year.
How did you get past the security system?
Beren:
Um?
[distracted by the spears/crowd/nightingales/jewels/waterfall/trees/Melian]
How . . .? I,
er, just, erm, kept walking, and . . . then I was here.
Thingol: [thinking]
--Yeah, right.
[aloud]
So, --Beren, is it?
--what do you do for a living?
Beren:
Orcs. Um.
I, uh, I hunt them. Sir. [winces]
Thingol:
Really.
And do you foresee a long-term career in this . . . admirable
venture of yours?
Beren: [desperate flippancy]
Well, I expect I'll
be doing it the rest of my life.
Thingol: [not amused]
And this should impress
me why?
Beren:
Well, my dad was a good
friend of the King of Nargothrond,
saved his life at the
Siege of Angband, and they say I take
after Da -- I might
be useful to have around, is all I'm saying.
Thingol: [biting sarcasm]
In case
you hadn't noticed, this isn't Nargothrond -- or do I look
like Finrod Felagund
to you?
Beren:
I, I don't know, sir;
I've never met King Finrod --
Thingol: [forced patience]
--That was a rhetorical
question, boy. I'm saying I don't care
who your friends-and-relations
are, I want to know what you
have to offer my daughter.
I didn't raise Luthien to be a beggar
or a gangster's moll
-- I expect her to take over the administration
of Doriath after me.
We have lots of people who can kill Orcs,
and with eons
more experience than you've got, so I don't really
see a place for your
talents in our organization.
Beren:
Well, my parents ran
a realm too, not as big as this, but nevertheless --
Thingol: [losing it]
Silence! Impertinent
puppy! Can you give me one good reason why
I shouldn't throw you
into the labyrinth and delete the key? Do
you really expect me
to believe that you've just been taking music
lessons from
my daughter in the forest? I should chop you into
pieces and chop the
pieces
into pieces! --unfortunately, you'd miss
most of it --
Beren: [nervously]
Um, I know this isn't
the best time to remind you, but Tinuviel
did say you'd promised
me a safe conduct . . .
[pause]
Thingol: [lethally]
Who's Tinuviel?
Beren:
. . .
Luthien: [exasperated]
It's my nickname, Daddy.
Like yours is Thingol. Because of my singing.
And you did promise.
In front of witnesses.
Thingol: [raising voice]
--but as I was about
to say, I stupidly promised her that I wouldn't
kill or maim you (I
can't think why, all she does is look at me and
I give her whatever
she asks for) but that doesn't mean I can't find
other ways to
keep you from getting at her, you empty-handed vagabond--
Melian: [mindspeech]
Ahem. Elu.
Thingol: [mindspeech]
--Yes, dear?
Melian: [mindspeech]
The good news is --
that he isn't a brainwashed slave sent here by
our Enemy to assassinate
you, kidnap Luthien or corrupt Doriath.
Thingol: [mindspeech]
Hmph. What's the bad?
Melian: [mindspeech]
That he isn't a brainwashed
slave sent here by our Enemy to
assassinate you, kidnap
Luthien or corrupt Doriath.
Thingol:
!?. . . !?
Melian: [mindspeech]
He's just a boy who's
fallen in love with a stranger
he met in the woods.
[longish pause]
Thingol: [mindspeech]
--It was different for
us...
Melian: [mindspeech, sighing]
It's always different...
[Simultaneous w/previous exchange: Enter the two chief warriors of Doriath.]
Beleg:
All right, all right,
what's all the fuss?
Mablung:
Daeron, old boy!
Fill us in!
[Daeron gives a guilty start and almost drops his flute]
Daeron:
Erm. Hullo, chaps.
It's that Man you were all out looking for.
He just turned up.
--How did he get past you?
Beleg:
How indeed? We
figured he'd jumped the gate and made
a run for it.
Done a bunk, as it were.
Mablung:
Right. When was
the last time anyone got past us, Strongbow?
Beleg: [thinking]
Mm, seventy-four years
ago. That wolf light-cavalry unit down the
cliffs on the other
side. Didn't get far, though.
Mablung:
You sure it's been that
long?
Beleg:
Sure I'm sure.
Mablung:
I don't remember all
of that -- I think you've got an extra
decade in there.
Beleg:
No, that was the winter
before the winter that the borders
got four cubits of snow
and five of those things with six legs
and two heads.
Mablung:
Anybody know what those
things are? What are they called,
anyway? Daeron?
[Daeron gives a guilty start]
You're the bard around here -- don't you know?
Beleg:
What's wrong with 'those
things with six legs and two heads?'
or better yet, 'those
dead
things with six legs and two heads' --?
[Melian gives them a Look, and they quiet down.
The conversation
regarding a suitable dowry is just concluding.]
Beren:
So, if I brought back
all three of them, and you had three
daughters, would you
let me marry all of them? --Just curious,
sounds like a real bargain
on elf-princesses--
Luthien: [stage whisper]
Beren! Shush!
I don't know how long it would take me to get
you out of the labyrinth
-- it might take a hundred years!
[Beren hushes up.]
SCENE II
Gower:
Now
let us turn aside from
counsels of the great
and cast our thoughts
upon the parting of the twain
whose love enduring
should downcast
the powers of earth
and e'en the gods . . .
[The hall before the main gates. Beren
is pacing and ranting in
nervous aftershock; Luthien holds his hand,
anchoring him, compass-like]
Beren:
I had it all planned
out. I was going to say --
'I've been engaged in
a systematic program of destabilization
targeted at the most
vulnerable areas of Morgoth's regime,
combined with a low-impact
lifestyle which honors traditional
Sindarin folkways and
combines high efficiency with respect
for Arda.' That
would have sounded halfway intelligent.
And I completely lost
it. I must have been hyperventilating:
I thought there was
this -- glowing light around your mother.
Luthien:
You could see that?
Most people don't notice.
Beren:
Y--your mom glows.
--Why?
Luthien:
It's only when she's
using her Power. She doesn't try to show
off or act like she's
different from Eldar, really.
Beren: [confused]
You're an Elf
-- but she isn't?
Luthien: [surprised]
She's Maiar. Doesn't
everyone know that?
Beren:
! . . . !
[shaking his head]
I thought it was bad
enough learning your father's the king -- now
I find out your mother's
a goddess --!
[starting to hyperventilate]
Luthien:
It's okay. I think
she likes you. The fact that you got past her Maze
without going mad means
you're Good. --I pointed that out to my father.
Beren:
I'm afraid it didn't
convince him.
Luthien:
He really isn't like
this. Well, he is sort of paranoid -- but he does have
reasons for that.
Given that people keep ambushing and betraying and trying
to destroy us -- and
those are our relatives, not the Dark Lord's minions.
Beren: [starting to rant again]
He doesn't think I have
a chance -- but I can do it. I made it through the
borders; I can sneak
into Angband. Frontal assault didn't work because it's
too obvious. Well,
and the Dragon and the Balrogs and the being outnumbered
part of it, too.
--Maybe I'll go disguised as a slave. They'll never expect
anyone trying to get
in,
not out . . .
Luthien:
Beren, you don't have
to prove anything to me. Let's just go.
We can take care of
ourselves -- we don't need civilization.
Beren:
No. Your dad's right.
I can't do that to you. Argh! Now I understand
my parents' dilemma.
Poor Ma . . .
Luthien:
I should go with you.
Beren:
No! If anything
happened to you I'd kill myself. You -- you can't
imagine what it's like
out there. The -- the spider-things and the
things with the eyes
. . .
Luthien:
But it's okay for you
to go.
[pause]
Beren: [quietly]
It's got to be easier
the second time. And I've been doing it for years.
Luthien:
Why don't you go ask
Finrod Felagund for assistance? He likes humans,
and he owes your family.
At least he'd give you supplies and maps.
Beren:
Good idea. I should
have thought of that. --Are you going to be all right?
Are your parents going
to make your life hell while I'm gone?
Luthien:
What are they going
to do? Lock me up in my room? I'm not a child of ninety.
Beren:
I wish we had some way
to contact each other. Even a pair of those matching
knives like in stories.
--You don't have anything like that here, do you?
Luthien:
No, that's magic, not
reality. --I should go with you. You need someone to
look after you --
Beren:
--Tinuviel, I'm comingback.
No matter what happens, I'm coming back to you.
Luthien:
I'm counting on it.
I'll be waiting for you, Beren. Forever.
Gower:
And here we draw the
curtain dark
across our scene of
parting and desire;
Of all that follows
after, legend and song alike recount,
to keep in mortal mem'ry
what the gods remember still --
how Luthien the elven-maid,
and Huan hound of heaven,
with Beren for love
brought down the walls of hell
and freed the First-light
from dark Morgoth's claws
and wove into the workings
of the worldis Doom
a brightling strand
that shineth yet, despite
(or through) the feeblest
efforts of the bards.
Thus
asking your gracious
pardon for this flight of fancy,
having proffered in
hopes of gentle diversion,
we end this our humble
file. Adieu!
EPILOGUE
Beleg: [between throws, leadingly]
Oh, oh, wait -- I know
what they are.
Mablung:
What?
Beleg:
In a word? --Fell.
Mablung:
Heh.
[Beren enters through the gates, slowly, looking
backwards, oblivious
to the knives being tossed to and fro.]
Beleg:
Careful there --
[In a flash Beren transforms from distracted
lover to superwarrior,
spinning round and drawing sword and dagger
at once to ward against
all comers. Seeing the Doriath Rangers he remains
in guard position
while he speaks.]
Beren:
What are you
doing here?
Beleg: [reasonably]
Waiting.
Beren:
For what?
Beleg:
Just waiting.
Beren: [lowers blades but does not put them up]
You're here to see that
I leave the grounds promptly and without
any trouble, right?
Beleg: [shrugs]
Something like that,
yes.
Beren:
Something exactly
like that, I'll bet.
Beleg:
Clever lad. You'll go
far, I shouldn't doubt.
Beren:
Don't.
Mablung: [sotto voce]
But will you come back
again, I wonder?
Beren:
Nothing -- and no one
-- is going to stop me. --I don't expect
you to believe me.
Mablung:
So you're really off
to infiltrate Morgoth's bunker? Defy the Lord
of Paranoids himself,
succeed where even Feanor (not to mention the
Great of Arda) went
down in flames?
Beren: [defensive]
Yup.
Mablung: [guessing wildly]
And you're what, all
of fifty summers?
Beren: [still more defensive]
Twenty-five. I think.
--Wish me luck, why don't you?
Mablung: [seriously]
Oh, we do. We do indeed.
Beren: [disbelieving]
Hmph.
[He turns and starts to walk off.]
Beleg:
Ah, not to be overly
critical, but Angband's that way, not the way
you're going.
Mablung:
--Unless he's
thinking of swinging by Nargothrond first.
Beren:
Clever fellow. Any final
words of advice or farewell?
Beleg:
Hm...'Be careful'?
Mablung:
'Good luck'?
Beleg:
--Yourself?
Beren:
Tell them that I won't
come back empty-handed, and that they will
see me again.
Mablung:
Beren.
[They lock stares. Pause.]
--The light of Elbereth go with you.
Beren: [serious]
Thank you . . . Sir.
--Look after her for me.
Mablung:
We always do.
Beleg: [sotto voce]
We try, at any rate.
[Beren looks round, pulls himself together, and vanishes into the forest.]
Beleg:
Did you see how he did
that?
Mablung:
You neither, eh? --Twenty-five.
[shakes head]
Beleg:
Think we'll see him
again?
Mablung: [shrugs]
I'm no seer.
Beleg:
Same here. Definitely.
Herself,
as well.
Mablung:
You saw that too, eh?
What do you think will come of it all?
Beleg:
Oh, death, destruction,
woe and lamentation.
Mablung:
The usual, then. --This
place is starting to get to me
again. Up for a warg-hunt,
Strongbow old chap?
Beleg:
Silly question. Whenever
not?
[They leave, strolling leisurely. Luthien appears in the doorway.]
Luthien: [softly]
Beren, you've made me
see time as a mortal woman does. It's
been an hour already!
How will I survive a day -- a week --
a year? Come
back soon, my love, and safe, or I promise you
I'll follow you to the
ends of Middle-earth -- or the stars.
[fade to black]
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